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IF YOU ARE CONCERNED, ASK

Too often, we wait for the other person to come to us.

If you have concerns, it is okay to state them and ask directly about mental health and suicide. 

Asking about suicide will not put the idea in their head.

In fact, asking shows the other person that we are willing to have the conversation, and it can actually provide comfort and increased possibility of honest communication.

Ask whenever you see warning signs and are concerned.

Warning signs of suicide include talking about suicide, expressing hopelessness, seeing oneself as a burden to others, displaying severe/overwhelming pain or distress, and marked changes in behavior, emotionality, or goals. You do not have to see any of these though to feel concern and open up a conversation.

Offer validation and communicate support.

You do not have to understand it, but you also do not have to change it. Validation is accepting the person where they are at, and support is showing that you are right there with them. "I hear you," "I am here for you," "I love you" are all validating and supportive statements. 

Focus on immediate next steps.

You do not have to have the answers, and you are not going to be able to fix it. But you can help to focus on immediate next steps - sitting for a few moments, getting a drink of water, calling a crisis line together, seeking out other supports...just focusing on one step at a time.

Supporting yourself.

Finding out a loved one is suicidal is a crisis situation, and it can leave you feeling confused, scared, helpless, and powerless. Make sure to find your supports as well, and know that you never have to handle this alone. 

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